diff --git a/services/monitoring/vmalert-atlas-availability.yaml b/services/monitoring/vmalert-atlas-availability.yaml
index 2c2bdaed8..8d8a3c3b5 100644
--- a/services/monitoring/vmalert-atlas-availability.yaml
+++ b/services/monitoring/vmalert-atlas-availability.yaml
@@ -10,15 +10,30 @@ data:
       - name: hermes.triage
         interval: 1m
         rules:
-          - alert: HermesTriageHumanRequired
+          # Escalation on its own is NOT worth an email. Every human_required
+          # incident already files an issue in the failing service's own repo,
+          # and that issue is the durable artifact. Mailing on every escalation
+          # made the inbox the loudest and least useful output of the system.
+          # Two things do deserve mail: a repair that ran and failed, and an
+          # escalation nobody has touched in hours.
+          - alert: HermesTriageActionFailed
+            expr: max by (jenkins_job, build) (ariadne_hermes_triage_incident{status="failed"}) == 1
+            for: 1m
+            labels:
+              severity: critical
+              service: hermes-triage
+            annotations:
+              summary: "Hermes repair FAILED: incident {{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }}"
+              description: "Ariadne authorized a remediation for {{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }} and it did not succeed, or its rebuild failed. This is the one case where the automation acted and did not leave things better. Jenkins build: https://ci.bstein.dev/job/{{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }}/"
+          - alert: HermesTriageUnattended
             expr: max by (jenkins_job, build) (ariadne_hermes_triage_incident{status="human_required"}) == 1
-            for: 2m
+            for: 6h
             labels:
               severity: warning
               service: hermes-triage
             annotations:
-              summary: "Hermes triage needs a human: incident {{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }}"
-              description: "Ariadne marked incident {{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }} as human_required (unsupported, ambiguous, or unsafe failure). Jenkins build: https://ci.bstein.dev/job/{{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }}/ - Ariadne diagnosis: GET /api/admin/testing/triage/latest or /api/admin/audit/events on ariadne.maintenance."
+              summary: "Hermes triage unattended 6h: incident {{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }}"
+              description: "Incident {{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }} has been human_required for six hours. Its issue was filed in the failing service's repository at the time of escalation; this alert only means nobody has resolved it since. Jenkins build: https://ci.bstein.dev/job/{{ $labels.jenkins_job }}/{{ $labels.build }}/"
   atlas-availability.yaml: |
     groups:
       - name: atlas.availability.gateway